Why Hooking with your Ex is bad news!
Hooking up with your Ex is bad news and disaster. Trust me, I have had my share of experience. You should always ask yourself ”why I want to hook up with him or her?” sometimes it’s mainly based on the sex they offer you in the past or the comfort of being with someone you know or maybe you going thru some emotional distress.
I will tell you hooking up with your Ex is a terrible decision that can put you in a series of emotional distress and trauma. I will explain why it’s better to move on from them.
1. You miss your ex, so your interest in a hookup could also be coming from a place of grief. hooking up with him/ her could fulfill your emotional needs at the time but the trauma that comes after or during that time will not fulfill your mental health. Rather, you should find other ways to get those needs met then rekindle with someone who hurt you in the past. It’s like going back on your words.
2. I will say, if you do decide you want to get in bed with him or her, it’s also a good idea to prepare yourself for all of the potential consequences. For one, he/ she could even be dating someone else without your knowledge. And, if you do get together for the night, there’s a major chance he’ll ghost you following the hookup or admit he/she ambivalent about your former relationship. If you don’t feel ready to deal with these tough truths, that’s probably a sign of why you shouldn’t hook up with your Ex.
3. Always remind yourself why you guys broke up in the first place. Always remind yourself of the hurt he/she put you through and always think that they can ghost you again. I know post-relationship hookups can give you a glimpse of the good times momentarily, but they also can skew your memory by isolating happy memories from you.
4. if your ex is staying in contact with you but won’t meet up or talk about closer, he/ she may be using you for emotional support as he/she had moved on without you. They just want to make sure that you’re not going to move on and keep you believing there is a chance of y’all getting back together. I will tell you my Ex calls or email me after every 3 months lol. I did block him everywhere, so he tries very hard to manipulate me. For example, he follows me on iTunes lol. I’m over him, so anytime he shows up, I constantly remind myself of all the pain and trauma he put me thru. So no sweet talk from him that gets in my head anymore. I’m happy in my relationship and his tactics don’t work on me anymore.
5. Remember that you are awesome, you are different from what they see out there. Trust me, they ask about you and stalk your social media daily to keep up with you. They remember those good vibes you bring out when y’all use to date. Your everyday energy, the tone of your voice, and how you interact with other people when they around you. Of course, they miss you but trust me it’s not the avenue to reconnect because it will only end badly. When they see you happy and they are miserable, they will attempt to reach out to see if they can still consume more energy from you.
Whatever the reason behind your exes reaching out, just remember you have choices. It may feel nice to catch up with an old flame, and if so, enjoy the walk down memory lane or maybe even a stroll down a new street together. On the other hand, if you’re not up for connecting, it’s OK to ignore a message or let them know your boundaries moving forward.