Coping With Long Distance Relationships
Relationships are that part of life that adds the extra spice to it. It’s particularly sweet when you’re able to see your loved ones as much as possible and spend quality time together, whispering sweet nothings, smiling sheepishly and be lost in a world of love! Love is indeed sweet!!
Monica Essien
1. Understand the situation
Understanding is key to a successful relationship. First, try to understand your partner and the reason for the distance. Was it existent before the relationship? Or at one point the other had to move away? Will there be a relocation soon? Or a return to base? Is your partner willing to wait for you and are you both willing to make it work regardless? These are very important questions where the success of your relationship is concerned. As much as possible, it’s important to talk about these things before delving into it. To avoid regrets and uncertainty during the relationship.
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2. Trust is paramount!
Another important ingredient to a successful relationship, whether long or short distance, is trust. Sincerely speaking, without trust, the flames will die out faster than a heartbeat. Trust is especially important, particularly since you’re far from each other. Funny thoughts are bound to run through your head. Thoughts like:
What if she’s with another man? What if he’s in the arms of another woman? What if I’m waiting in vain? What if he’s forgotten me? What if she’s left me already?
But then, whenever these thoughts arise, kill them sharp with the speed of light. Whenever you’re in doubt, always remember the love you both share and promise you’ve made to be together. And purposely decide to trust your partner for a happy and healthier relationship
3. Communication is key!!
Talk, talk and talk regularly! As much as you’re talking, give your fair share of listening too! Everyone loves to be able to express themselves by way of words and a listening ear is very vital. As much as possible, talk about everything that matters. Talk about the littlest things too. The tiny fears. The lingering doubts. Even the punchy shoes and runny nose. Let your partner have an idea of what life’s like with you. Always be sure to really communicate with each other. In this age of social media, communication is now as easy as the snap of your fingers, so utilize it maximally. Share picture stories, make videos, video chat, etc. Make each time spent with each other memorable for both of you.
4. Spend as much time in each other’s company whenever possible
Whenever you or your partner pay a visit, make the most of the valuable time. Plan trips together and spends the moments lost in the arms of each other. Generally, get to know each other better and create lasting memories to strengthen the relationship.
5. Reach out and be supportive
There’ll definitely be trying times. It sure won’t be easy being apart and facing difficult times. Try to understand your partner and whatever he/she could be going through. Understand that life won’t be the same for him/her over there as it is for you. So when you feel your partner is down, reach out and offer your maximum support. Talk about the problems and let them know you care. But then, I also understand the need to be left alone sometimes. They just might want to deal with it all by themselves. If that’s the case, give them some space so you don’t end up crowding each other’s lives. But don’t go too far, they’ll need you in the end.
6. Don’t bottle it up!
Your partner is bound to offend you sometimes, but don’t fail to let him/her know. Maybe that drink with his female friend or that time she went out with that guy got you feeling jealous. It’s only normal to feel that way, so don’t be scared to say so. It’s ok to voice your fears and concerns. It’s also ok to tell the other when you’re offended. Sometimes, it’s really unintentional and they can’t read minds to know their faults. So instead of seething silently and fighting with yourself, or worse, pretending that it’s ok; talk with your partner and resolve your differences. You’ll realize they’re not that big after all!
Finally, distance is never a barrier for a love so true.
Remember that it’s a decision you made to be together, in spite of distance and the prevailing circumstances. So whenever you feel lonely, (which you will, plenty of times) remember that you’re still on the same planet. And distance is never a barrier for a beating heart! So if you’re both determined, then you’ve got this and you can make it work! All the best!!
